That feeling of having made it
It is not easy when writing do not risk falling into platitudes or repetitions. And yet this time even if it happens I would feel justified. Yes, because I made peace with myself today. Today I realized a dream in the drawer, the umpteenth, that I had for a long time.
I’m traveling alone. I came to the place that is closest to me to magic. I’m in Calcata. Yes it is true I come there quite often. I brought several people to whom I love but it was a long time ago that I had the desire not to do the usual bites and escapes in this place.
I wanted to stop for a while. I wanted to live it. I wanted to feel an integral part of the magic I breathe when I walk through this door.
Yesterday morning, finally, I decided. I found a location that was right for me in both location and budget and I booked. I left this morning with the intention of leaving behind the thoughts, frustrations and all the weights I have been carrying for a long time. I’m free. I’m a free spirit. I am alone with myself, with the person who best understands me in the world and with whom, for some time, I feel I have made peace.
I’m excited, I don’t know what awaits me, but what is happening so far is already going on far beyond my expectations.
The girl with whom I talked via what’s up for the room turned out to be a nice person and an immediate feeling was born. It took three or four voice messages to turn one host and one customer into two people who spoke the same language. You, Debora, not only rent my dream room here in Calcata, but organize events. We do the same thing and, as I often do in this period, from one speech inevitably comes to another and then here we start with ideas and desire to collaborate. We will. I hope very soon, because if “nothing is by chance” with Debora there are too many things we have in common! Starting with the Roman quarter where we were born. It seems like one of the many stories built at the table, but it’s real life.
Now I’m finally in this room, a pied à terre exactly as I dream of it. A single environment, welcoming and enclosing the essence of who we are and where it is located. A mixture of color, warmth and desire to stay here for life.
I was reminded of a lot of ideas for events and tour packages to compose. This morning, as soon as I arrived in Calcata, I went down with my faithful shoulder bag, my water bottle and my printed book to be reread to start on Monday the editing work, at the Treja Valley.
I was all picky on my way down. I was fine. I was at peace. I had no timetable, no mental burdens, I was exactly where I wanted to be. Nothing more. I chose a little one along the river to sit. I laid out the towel and started rereading my book. I made only a few slight corrections and added a final note. I had no anxiety standing there alone, maybe it was the first time in my life that I felt satisfied beyond all expectations. When two children arrived with their parents and positioned themselves next to me I smiled at them. I was happy to see them.
They didn’t bother me even though I was immersed in my reading (as they thought of them almost apologizing for disturbing my stillness!), I liked to hear the giggles of that 18-month-old blonde baby, who was doing everything naked bathing in the river. His laughter, his happiness were equal to mine. Although with so many more years I smiled exactly like him. So much I was immersed in the reading and well-being of that place that I was about to be late to the appointment with Debora. Quickly greeting my neighbor’s group, I started to make the path backwards with the heart that I feared would come out at least a couple of times from the chest. If the descent had seemed steep but I was humming and hopping like Heidi in its mountains, the ascent put me to the test and the delay in which I was aggravated even more my lungs. In the end, as always, I made it.
I arrived with my usual “right” advance and from there began something that maybe one day I will be able to call “friendship” with a woman I discovered having chosen to pursue her own well-being several years ago.
It is true that life constantly puts you in front of the people who are more in line with your life. Until now, I have almost always met people frustrated by grueling shifts, incongruous salaries and stressed by the fast pace of life that becomes a survival. Since I started walking down this road, I know and talk to people who have understood the true essence of life. The freedom to enjoy your time, to wake up wherever you are happy for that new day that you will put before you. People who have understood that the greatest good of life is their freedom and happiness.